Five amusing limericks for your Phonetics class

Learn English phonemes and have fun:

[V/i:]

There was a young lady of Calcutta

Who had a very bad stutter.

She said to her niece

Will you pass me the cheese

And the b-b-b-b- butter

 [u:/aU]

A diner while dining at Crewe

Found a rather large mouse in his stew,

Said the waiter, "Don't shout

And wave it about,

Or the rest will be wanting one, too."

[aI@/Q]

There was an odd fellow of Tyre,

Who constantly sat on the fire.

When asked , "Are you hot?"

He said, "Certainly not,

I´m James Winterbotham, Esquire."

[I/O:]

There was an old person of Wick,

Who said, "Tick-a-Tick, Tick-a-Tick,

Chickabee, Chickabaw,"

And he said nothing more,

This laconic old person of Wick.

[{/t]

There was a young girl of West Ham

Who hastily jumped on a tram.

When she had embarked

The conductor remarked,

"Your fare, miss." She answered, "I am."

Vocabulary help

stutter - tartamudez
niece - sobrina

diner - comensal

stew - estofado

don't shout and wave it about - no grite y lo agite en el aire

odd fellow - tipo raro

Esquire = Mr (but written after the name)

who hastily jumped on a tram - que se subió apresuradamente en un tranvía

your fare (su billete) = you're fair (es usted guapa)