I remember a friend of mine buying a couple of cheeses at Liverpool. Splendid cheeses they were, ripe and mellow, and with a two-hundred horse-power scent about them that might have been warranted to carry three miles, and knock a man over at two hundred yards. I was in Liverpool at the time, and my friend said that if I didn't mind he would get me to take them back with me to London, as he should not be coming up for a day or two himself, and he did not think the cheeses ought to be kept much longer.
'Oh, with pleasure, dear boy,' I replied, 'with pleasure.'
I called for the cheeses, and took them away in a cab. It was a ramshackle affair, dragged along by a knock-kneed, broken-winded somnabulist, which his owner in a moment of enthusiasm, during conversation, referred to as a horse. I put the cheeses on the top, and we started off at a shamble that would have done credit to the swiftest steam-roller ever built, and all went merry as a funeral bell, until we turned a corner. There, the wind carried a whiff from the cheeses full on our steed. It woke him up, and, with a snort of terror, he dashed off at three miles an hour. The wind still blew in his direction, and before we reached the end of the street he was laying himself out at the rate of nearly four miles an hour, leaving the cripples and stout old ladies simply nowhere.
It took two porters as well as the driver to hold him in at the station; and I do not think they would have done it, even then, had not one of the men had the presence of mind to put a handkerchief over his nose, and to light a bit of brown paper.
I took my ticket, and marched proudly up the platform, with my cheeses, the people falling back respectfully on either side. The train was crowded, and I had to get into a carriage where there were already seven other people. One crusty old gentleman objected, but I got in, notwithstanding; and, putting my cheeses upon the rack, squeezed down with a pleasant smile, and said it was a warm day. A few moments passed, and then the old gentleman began to fidget.
'Very close in here,' he said.
'Quite oppressive,' said the man next to him.
And then they both began sniffing, and, at the third sniff, they caught it right on the chest, and rose up without another word and went out. And then a stout lady got up, and said it was disgraceful that a respectable married woman should be harried about in this way, and gathered up a bag and eight parcels and left. The remaining four passengers sat on for a while, until a solemn-looking man in the corner who, from his dress and general appearance, seemed to belong to the undertaker class, said it put him in mind of a dead baby; and the other three passenger tried to get out of the door at the same time, and hurt themselves.
I smiled at the black gentleman, and said I thought we were going to have the carriage to ourselves; and he laughed pleasantly and said that some people made such a fuss over a little thing. But even he grew stangely depressed after we had started, and so, when we reached Crewe, I asked him to come and have a drink. He accepted, and we forced our way into the buffet, where we yelled, and stamped, and waved our umbrellas for a quarter of an hour; and then a young lady came and asked us if we wanted anything.
'What's yours?' I said, turning to my friend.
'I'll have half-a-crown's worth of brandy, neat, if you please, miss,' he responded.
And he went off quietly after he had drunk it and got into another carriage, which I thought mean.
From Crewe I had the compartment to myself, though the train was crowded. As we drew up at the different stations, the people, seeing my empty carriage, would rush for it. 'Here y' are, Maria; come along, plenty of room.' 'All right, Tom; we'll get in here,' they would shout. And they would run along, carrying heavy bags, and fight round the door to get in first. And one would open the door and mount the steps and stagger back into the arms of the man behind him; and they would all come and have a sniff, and then drop off and squeeze into other carriages, or pay the difference and go first.
From Euston I took the cheeses down to my friend's house. When his wife came into the room, she smelt round for an instant. Then she said:
'What is it? Tell me the worst.'
I said:
'It's cheeses. Tom bought them in Liverpool, and asked me to bring them up with me.'
And I added that I hoped she understood that it had nothing to do with me; and she said that she was sure of that, but that she would speak to Tom about it when he came back.
GLOSSARY
ripe and mellow - muy curado
and a two-hundred power scent about them - y con un olor de 200 caballos/y con un fortísimo olor
that might have been warranted to carry three miles - que es seguro que podría haberse olido a tres millas de distancia
and knock over a man at two hundred yards - y tirar para atrás a un hombre a 200 yardas
my friend said that if I didn't mind he would get me to take them back with me to London - mi amigo dijo que si no me importaba si se valía de mí para llevarlos de vuelta conmigo a Londres
he did not think the cheeses ought to be kept much longer - no creía que los quesos aguantarían mucho más tiempo
cab - coche de caballos
ramshackle - desvencijado
knock-kneed - patizambo
broken-winded - de respiración dificultosa
we started off at a shamble that would have done credit to the swiftest steamroller ever built - partimos a un paso lento que habría hecho honor a la apisonadora más veloz jamás construida
all went merry as a funeral bell - todo fue alegre como una campana tocando a muerto
the wind carried a whiff from the cheeses full on our steed - el viento trajo una bocanada procedente de los quesos que le dio de lleno a nuestro corcel
It woke him up - lo despertó
and, with a snort of terror - y con un bufido de terror
he dashed off at three miles an hour - salió disparado a tres millas por hora
he was laying himself out - iba lanzado
leaving the cripples and stout old ladies simply nowhere - apartando del camino a los tullidos y a las gruesas ancianas
It took two porters as well as the driver to hold him in - hicieron falta dos mozos además del cochero para pararlo
to have the presence of mind - tener la suficiente presencia de ánimo
to light a bit of brown paper - quemar un poco de papel de estraza
the people falling back respectfully on either side - echándose la gente respetuosamente para atrás a ambos lados
crusty - gruñón
notwithstanding - no obstante
rack - portaequipajes
to squeeze down - hacerse un hueco
to fidget - moverse inquieto
very close in here - muy estrecho aquí dentro
quite oppressive - muy agobiante
to sniff - olfatear
they caught it right on the chest - les alcanzó el olor en pleno pecho
disgraceful - vergonzoso
to be harried about - ser agobiada por todos lados
to sit on - seguir sentado
seemed to belong to the undertaker class - parecía ser alguien de las pompas fúnebres
it put him in mind of a dead baby - le recordaba a un bebé muerto
some people made a fuss over a little thing - alguna gente protestaba por una insignificancia
we yelled, and stamped, and waved our umbrellas - gritamos, pateamos y agitamos los paraguas
'what's yours?' - ¿que quiere usted tomar?
half-a-crown's worth of brandy - media corona de coñac
neat - solo, sin agua
which I thought mean - lo cual me pareció mezquino
As we drew up at the different stations - Cuando parabamos en las distintas estaciones
plenty of room - mucho sitio
to stagger back - tambalearse para atrás
to drop off - retirarse
to go first - irse a la primera clase
she smelled round for an instant - olió a su alrededor durante un instante
'Tell me the worst' - dime lo peor
EJERCICIO
Rellena los huecos con las partículas usadas en el texto:
I remember a friend of mine buying a couple of cheeses at Liverpool. Splendid cheeses they were, ripe and mellow, and ... a two-hundred horse-power scent .... them that might have been warranted to carry three miles, and knock a man ..... at two hundred yards. I was in Liverpool ... the time, and my friend said that if I didn't mind he would get me to take them ... with me to London, as he should not be coming up ... a day or two himself, and he did not think the cheeses ought to be kept much longer.
'Oh, with pleasure, dear boy,' I replied, 'with pleasure.'
I called ... the cheeses, and took them ... in a cab. It was a ramshackle affair, dragged along ... a knock-kneed, broken-winded somnabulist, which his owner ... a moment of enthusiasm, during conversation, referred ... as a horse. I put the cheeses ... the top, and we started ... at a shamble that would have done credit ... the swiftest steam-roller ever built, and all went merry as a funeral bell, until we turned a corner. There, the wind carried a whiff ... the cheeses full on our steed. It woke him ..., and, ... a snort of terror, he dashed ... at three miles an hour. The wind still blew ... his direction, and before we reached the end ... the street he was laying himself out ... the rate of nearly four miles an hour, leaving the cripples and stout old ladies simply nowhere.
It took two porters as well as the driver to hold him in ... the station; and I do not think they would have done it, even then, had not one of the men had the presence ... mind to put a handkerchief ... his nose, and to light a bit ... brown paper.
I took my ticket, and marched proudly ... the platform, with my cheeses, the people falling ... respectfully ... either side. The train was crowded, and I had to get ... a carriage where there were already seven other people. One crusty old gentleman objected, but I got ..., notwithstanding; and, putting my cheeses upon the rack, squeezed down ... a pleasant smile, and said it was a warm day. A few moments passed, and then the old gentleman began to fidget.
'Very close ... here,' he said.
'Quite oppressive,' said the man next ... him.
And then they both began sniffing, and, ... the third sniff, they caught it right ... the chest, and rose up ... another word and went .... And then a stout lady got ..., and said it was disgraceful that a respectable married woman should be harried about ... this way, and gathered up a bag and eight parcels and left. The remaining four passengers sat on ... a while, until a solemn-looking man in the corner who, ... his dress and general appearance, seemed to belong ... the undertaker class, said it put him ... mind of a dead baby; and the other three passenger tried to get ... of the door ... the same time, and hurt themselves.
I smiled ... the black gentleman, and said I thought we were going to have the carriage ... ourselves; and he laughed pleasantly and said that some people made such a fuss ... a little thing. But even he grew stangely depressed ... we had started, and so, when we reached Crewe, I asked him to come and have a drink. He accepted, and we forced our way ... the buffet, where we yelled, and stamped, and waved our umbrellas ... a quarter of an hour; and then a young lady came and asked us if we wanted anything.
'What's yours?' I said, turning ... my friend.
'I'll have half-a-crown's worth ... brandy, neat, if you please, miss,' he responded.
And he went ... quietly after he had drunk it and got ... another carriage, which I thought mean.
From Crewe I had the compartment ... myself, though the train was crowded. As we drew up ... the different stations, the people, seeing my empty carriage, would rush ... it. 'Here y' are, Maria; come along, plenty ... room.' 'All right, Tom; we'll get in here,' they would shout. And they would run ..., carrying heavy bags, and fight round the door to get ... first. And one would open the door and mount the steps and stagger ... into the arms of the man ... him; and they would all come and have a sniff, and then drop off and squeeze ... other carriages, or pay the difference and go first.
From Euston I took the cheeses down ... my friend's house. When his wife came ...to the room, she smelt round ... an instant. Then she said:
'What is it? Tell me the worst.'
I said:
'It's cheeses. Tom bought them in Liverpool, and asked me to bring them up ... me.'
And I added that I hoped she understood that it had nothing to do ... me; and she said that she was sure ... that, but that she would speak ... Tom ... it when he came back.
Very funny extract.
ResponderEliminarThanks! Glad you liked it.
ResponderEliminar