Food idioms -2

A few weeks ago, you had the opportunity to learn some food idioms, but in case you haven't had your fill yet, here you have some more:

Exercise

Complete the following idioms with one of the following words: 
bacon, butter, butterfingers, cake, cheese, peach, onions, pie, potato, soup:

1.- You should get out more and watch less TV, you're turning into a real couch ........

2.- Except for a bit of ........ fuzz, the baby was born bald.
3.- When it comes to computers, he really knows his ........
4.- No one ever thought she was so naughty; she always looked as if .......... wouldn't melt in her mouth.
5.- My wife has had to bring home the ...... ever since I broke my leg.
6.- He's in the .......... It's the third time this month he's been caught exceeding the speed limit.
7.- The goalkeeper had the ball, but he dropped it. What a ........he is!
8.- Simon wants to have his .......... and eat it too. He won't marry me, but he doesn't want me to date anyone else.
9.- He was a very influential man; he seemed to have a finger in every ........
10. I thought I was just going to interview the secretary, but they let me talk to the big ........ himself.

KEY

1.- potato; 2.- peach; 3.- onions; 4.- butter; 5.- wife; 6.- soup; 7.- butterfingers; 8.- cake; 9.- pie; 10.- cheese.

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World Englishes by Prof. David Crystal.

I have the pleasure to share with you today the interview to the prestigious linguist Prof. David Crystal, conducted by Tony O'Brien, Western Balkans British Council Director in Belgrade on 9 November 2013, Prof. Crystal maintains that there isn't only a 'World English', but lots of 'World Englishes', as many as countries where English is spoken. I find this talk very enlightening and enjoyed it thoroughly, and I'm sure you will enjoy it too:

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Children's songs to learn English: the animals went in two by two

Here's another children's song to learn English, while having a bit of fun too. If you, teachers, find it too long, you can always shorten it to your taste:

Lyrics

The animals went in two by two, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in two by two, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in two by two, the elephant and the kangaroo
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in three by three, hurrah! hurrah!

The animals went in three by three, hurrah! hurrah!

The animals went in three by three, the wasp, the ant and the bumblebee.

And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in four by four, hurrah! hurrah!

The animals went in four by four, hurrah! hurrah!

The animals went in four by four, the great hippopotamus stuck on the door.

And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in five by five, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in five by five, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in five by five, they warmed each other to keep alive
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in six by six, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in six by six, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in six by six, they turned out the monkey because of his tricks
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in seven by seven, hurrah! hurrah!

The animals went in seven by seven, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in seven by seven, the little pig thought he was going to heaven
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain. 

The animals went in eight by eight, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in eight by eight, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in eight by eight, the turtle thought that he was coming late,
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in nine by nine, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in nine by nine, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in nine by nine, marching up in a long straight line,
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain.

The animals went in ten by ten, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in ten by ten, hurrah! hurrah!
The animals went in ten by ten, the last one was a little red hen,
And they all went into the ark, for to get out of the rain

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Gramática- Plurales extranjeros

Plurales Extranjeros

Ciertos nombres de origen extranjero, en su mayoría cultismos de origen griego o latino, tienen plurales especiales:

- singular terminado en –is       →        plural en -es /i:z/:

basis                           base                            bases

crisis                           crisis                            crises

diagnosis                    diagnóstico                  diagnoses

hypothesis                  hipótesis                      hypotheses

oasis                           oasis                            oases

- singular terminado en -us       →        plural en -i /aI/:

bacillus                       bacilo                          bacilli

stimulus                      estímulo                       stimuli

- singular terminado en -on      →        plural en -a /@/:

criterion                     criterio                         criteria

phenomenon              fenómeno                     phenomena

- singular terminado en -a        →        plural en -ae /i:/:

alga                            alga                             algae

larva                           larva                            larvae

Algunos nombres de este mismo origen en proceso de asimilación por el idioma tienen plural regular inglés además del latino o griego:

cactus                         cacto                           cactuses/cacti

corpus                        corpus                         corpuses/corpora

formula                       fórmula            formulas/formulae (formulae se usa esp. en química y en matemáticas.)

fungus                        hongo                          funguses/fungi

nucleus                       núcleo                          nucleuses/nuclei

Otros, ya totalmente asimilados, sólo tienen el plural regular en -s o -es:

bonus                          bonificación                 bonuses

campus                       campus                        campuses

encyclopaedia            enciclopedia                 encyclopaedias

virus                           virus                            viruses

A veces, los dos plurales tienen significados distintos:

antenna                      antena                          antennas (antenas de TV = aerials)

                                                                       antennae (antenas de artrópodos)

medium                      medio                          mediums (medios espiritistas)

                                                                       media (medios de información)

Hay, por último, algunos plurales acabados en -i, procedentes del italiano. Algunos de ellos, como graffiti y paparazzi, suelen usarse solamente en plural, aunque tengan también una forma singular acabada en -o:

The walls were covered with graffiti Los muros estaban cubiertos de pintadas

The paparazzi follow her everywhere she goes Los paparazzi la siguen a dondequiera que va

One of the paparazzi managed to photograph her with her new love Uno de los paparazzi consiguió fotografiarla con su nuevo amor

otros del mismo origen, como cannelloni, macaroni, ravioli y spaghetti, son «no contables» en inglés, por lo que llevan el verbo en singular:

Ravioli was in preparation for dinner Se estaban haciendo los ravioli para la cena

Para saber más sobre el tema, ver mi Gramática Inglesa, 9ª ed., pp. 52-54.

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Léxico: False friends

FALSE FRIENDS

We say that a word is a ‘false friend’ or a ‘false cognate’ when it has the same or very similar form in two languages, but a different meaning in each. The similarity may cause students to use the word wrongly, giving rise sometimes to awkward misunderstandings: fastidious, for example, does not mean ‘fastidioso’ (annoying, bothersome), but ‘meticuloso’. 
Sometimes an English term is equivalent to a Spanish one, but only in one of its meanings: to assist can mean ‘asistir’, but only in the sense of ‘socorrer, ayudar’; for ‘asistir a un acto’ you must use to attend; café means ‘café’ only in the sense of the place where you can have coffee (the beverage). These terms can be described as partially false friends.


EXERCISE: Answer the following questions:

a.-When someone refers to the actual events, is he referring to events happening now?

b.- If a woman says she’s embarrassed, does it mean she’s expecting a baby?

c.- If your teacher asks you to resume your work, does he want you to summarize it?

d.- If I say that my mother was dismayed at the news, do I mean that she passed out?

e.- If your girlfriend forgot to buy you a birthday present, would you regard it as a deception?

f.- Is a comedian supposed to be gracious?

KEY

a.- no, he’s referring to the events themselves; b.- no, she means she’s confused or disconcerted; c.- no, he wants me to continue with my work; d.- no, you mean that she was upset; e.- no, as a disappointment; f.- no, funny

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Pincelada de humor de los Apuntes Secretos de Sir Francis

Tenemos un poco olvidado a Sir Francis. Bueno, tras una semana intensa con The First World Week of Phrasal Verbs, no viene mal un breve paréntesis de humor con Sir Francis, con una entrada tomada de sus Apuntes Secretos:

aphrodisiac. Afrodisíaco, sustancia que excita o aumenta el apetito sexual. Aunque no esté demostrado científicamente, tienen esta reputación algunas sustancias, tales como la raíz de ginseng, la yohimbina, la cantárida, conocida vulgarmente como ‘la mosca española’ (the Spanish fly) y algunos alimentos, como las ostras, las almejas y demás moluscos, el apio, los espárragos, el caviar, la miel, las trufas, etc. De todos ellos, parece que son las ostras las más efectivas, aunque no siempre funcionen al cien por cien, como en el caso, relatado por Sir Francis, de aquella novia virgen que, por consejo de su madre, la noche de bodas le hace tomar al novio una docena antes de acostarse para darle fuerza. Al preguntarle la madre, a la mañana siguiente, cómo había ido la cosa, la hija responde: «I fed him a dozen oysters like you said, but only nine of them worked» (“le di una docena de ostras como me dijiste, pero sólo nueve funcionaron”). A ese ritmo, las posibilidades de supervivencia del pobre fulano eran más bien escasas, como las del protagonista del siguiente limerick:

     There’s an oversexed lady named Whyte

     Who insists on a dozen a night.

            A fellow from Cheddar

            Had the brashness to wed her –

     His chance of survival is slight.

    

     Una ‘cachonda’ llamada María

     En doce polvos por noche insistía.

     Un vecino de Marbella

     Que osó casarse con ella

     Tiene el pobre contados sus días.

     Por otra parte, el bromuro es el más famoso anti-afrodisíaco: «An old soldier [...] meets another in the street. “You remember the bromide that they gave us during the war to quiet us down?” he asks. “Yes...” “It’s just beginning to work”» (un veterano de guerra se encuentra con otro en la calle y le dice “¿te acuerdas del bromuro que nos daban durante la guerra para aplacarnos? Ahora está empezando a hacer efecto”).

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The World Week of Phrasal Verbs -2

Here you have your phrasal verbs for Thursday and Friday, to complete the World Phrasal Verbs Week. On Friday, we bring to a close our 1st World Week of Phrasal Verbs. No phrasal verbs por Saturday or Sunday, as I guess you have better things to do on the weekend.

Phrasal Verbs for Thursday

Fill in the gaps with the appropriate particle:

1.- This computer is sold with the printer thrown .......
2.- I wish you would stop showing me ...... in front of my friends 
3.- The stress of her husband's illness is beginning to tell ...... her
4.- Someone will stand ......    ...... the main actor in that dangerous scene
5.- She set ...... her work with great enthusiasm
6.- Don't let your imagination run .......    ...... you
7.- He's really good at putting his message ......
8.- Stop frittering money ...... on clothes you're never going to wear

Phrasal Verbs for Friday

Complete each sentence with a phrasal verb with the same or almost the same meaning as the verb given in brackets. As an aditional help, the initial letter of each phrasal verb is provided:

1.- We'll w.......   ..... our campaign with a meeting in Madrid [end]
2.- It's rumoured that, because of the recesion, 20% of the workers are to be l.....   ..... next month [dismiss]
3.- As he passed the table he accidentally k.....   ...... a glass of beer [upset]
4.- The papers are all full of the scandal, but in a few days it will all have b.....   ...... [be forgotten]
5.- The government has made a serious mistake but, of course, they're doing what they can to  p...... it ...... [minimise]
6.- He was very ill last year but, thank goodness, he p.....   ..... [recover]
7.- They've r....   ..... a large phone bill [accumulate]
8.- Cholera was s.....   ...... in this country long ago [eradicate]

KEY

Thursday: 1.- in; 2.- up; 3.- on: 4.- in for; 5.- about; 6.- away with; 7.- across; 8.- away

Friday: 1.- wind up; 2.- laid off; 3.- knocked over; 4.- blown over; 5.- play down; 6.- pulled through; 7.- run up; 8.- stamped out

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The World Week of Phrasal Verbs - 1

The World Day of this, the World Day of that, the World Week of this, the World Week of that, but no world day or week of phrasal verbs. Well, this week is going to be 'The World Week of Phrasal Verbs' for us, OK?

Phrasal Verbs for Monday

Complete each sentence with a phrasal verb with the same or almost the same meaning as the verb given in brackets. As an additional help,  the initial letter of each phrasal verb is provided:

1.- Last year the company decided to b..... ......  into some new lines [expand]
2.- Capital punishment was d.....  .....   ..... in Britain fifty years ago [abolish]
3.- They l.....   ..... extra trains during the rush hour [provide]
4.- Jim f.....    .....   ..... his brother when they were in their twenties, and they didn't see each other for fifteen years [quarrel with]
5.- The TV program was so boring that I d.....   ..... [fall asleep]
6.- That music will never  c......   ..... [become popular]
7- Nick always relies on his wife to s.....   ..... all the arrangements for their holidays [organise]
8.- Our business went through a bad patch last year, but things seem to be  p.....   ..... now [improve]

Phrasal Verbs for Tuesday

Replace the verb in italics with a phrasal verb with the same meaning:

1.- The plane has just landed. You have an hour before it leaves again
2.- They were despised by almost everybody who knew them
3.- I'm not prepared to tolerate insolence from you
4.- I'm a bit squeamish. I always faint at the sight of blood
5.- A well known company is thinking of establishing a new factory in this town
6.- It was clear from the way they were huddled together in a corner that they were plotting something
7.- Raising a family on a teacher's pay is extremely difficult
8.- If you admit the offence, we shall deal with you leniently

Phrasal Verbs for Wednesday

Complete the sentences with an appropiate compound of to give or to take:

1.- As you can see, the rear of the building ......   ..... the river.
2.- The boy is quite gullible and easy to .....   .....
3.- I want you to .....   ...... everything I say
4.- Have you .....   ..... the money you borrowed from him earlier in the month?
5.- The rotten eggs were .....   ..... a most unpleasant odour
6.- This gentleman is going to .....   .....   ..... me while I'm away
7.- There was a tremendous crash as the roof .....   .....
8.- A man standing on the corner was trying to ....   ..... five-pound notes. but most people thought there was a catch in it

KEY

Monday: 1.- branch out; 2.- done away with; 3.- lay on; 4.- fell out with; 5.- dozed off; 6.- catch on; 7.- sort out; 8.- picking up

Tuesday: 1.- touched down, takes off; 2.- looked down on; 3.- put up with; 4.- pass out; 5.- setting up; 6.- were up to; 7.- Bringing up; 8.- own up to

Wednesday: 1.- gives onto; 2.- take in; 3.- take down; 4.- given back; 5.- giving off; 6.- take over from; 7.- gave way; 8.- give away

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Food Idioms

FOOD IDIOMS

Exercise

Complete the following idioms with one of the following words: milk, egg, bread, carrot, salt, biscuit, cherry, potato, peas, jam

           

      1.         After their team lost the match 5-0, the fans were left with..........on their face.

      2.         You really take the ...............for making a fool of yourself with women.

      3.         He was lucky – they let him have another bite at the ...............

      4.         He’s been unemployed for over two years, so it’s his wife who’s the ........... winner now.

      5.         The pay is good and what you have to do couldn’t be simpler - it’s  money   for .........

      6.             The mirror is broken and we can't fix it. There's no need to cry over spilled .................

      7.         He’s a liar- You should take whatever he says with a pinch of ................

      8.         The question of pensions is a hot ............. for both the unions and the government.

      9.         It’s really difficult to tell one from the other – they’re as like as two ...............

      10.        To get the best out of your workforce it’s probably better to use the .......... rather than the stick.

KEY

1-egg; 2-biscuit; 3-cherry, 4-bread; 5-jam; 6-milk; 7-salt, 8-potato, 9-peas; 10-carrot

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Talking Statues: mutilated text (2nd part)

Here you have the mutilated text of the 2nd part of the interview to Henry VIII's statuehttp://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2014/11/historias-y-humor-talking-statues.html. I invite you to fill in the blanks. To help you, I give you the first letter of every word omitted:


J: Well, it was Jane Seymour, your third wife, who finally g..... birth, in 1537, to a son, Prince Edward, the future Edward VI. You must have been very h.... the day he was born?


H: Yes, it was, without a doubt, the happiest day of my life, and the e..... was celebrated all over the country, but my happiness soon t....... to sorrow. It had been a difficult d....., and Jane died 12 days later from an infection.


J: Well, in any case, you had at last the male heir you had so l.... wished for, why then did you have to marry Anne of Cleves, your fourth wife, a German lady who cannot be s..... to have been a paragon of beauty, her face a..... being pock-marked and her laugh resembling a horse's n.......?


H: She was not as ugly and disagreeable as you are making her o....to be, but it is true that I was misled by a much too flattering p...... Hans Holbein the Younger had painted of her a.... my request, and indeed when we first met, I found she was quite unattractive. I married her n....... in an attempt to ensure my succession. I was worried about Edward. The royal doctors had told me that the Prince's health was poor, and I somehow sensed that he wouldn't outlive me b.... many years.


J: Anyway, it seems that you could not o....... the revulsion Anne's hideous looks made you feel, t..... the extent that it was rumoured you could not even make love to her. T....., less than six months after you had married her, you expressed your desire to annul the marriage so that you could w..... another. Anne had the g..... sense to confirm that the marriage had never been consummated, probably s....... her life by her admission.


H: Yes, the marriage was dissolved, but we r......... good friends. Anne received the title of 'The King's Sister', two houses and a g......... allowance.


J: Well, free again, you married for the fifth time, the woman of your c....... being now the young and beautiful Catherine Howard, Anne Boleyn's cousin and her lady-in-waiting. But the marriage to Catherine didn't l....... long either, as she was, like her cousin Anne had been, b...... But why did you have her beheaded?


H: Well, she was found guilty of a........, this time without the shadow of a doubt so, m....... to my regret, the only thing I could do was to order her e....... to safeguard my honour.


J: Finally, in 1543, four years b........ your death, you married the wealthy widow Catherine Parr, your sixth and last wife. What can you tell me about her?


H: Catherine p...... to be a good choice. She looked a..... me, patiently enduring my frequent changes of m......., brought about by my painful disease and, soon after we were married, she persuaded me to be r...... with my daughters Mary and Elizabeth who, through An A..... of Parliament, were duly put back in the l...... of succession after Edward, Prince of Wales.


J: And they both became Queens in due t......: first Mary, when Edward died when he was only 15, confirming your premonition about him, and then Elizabeth, after Mary died w........ issue. Concerning Mary, it's been suggested you may have entertained hopes that when she a....... to the throne, she would serve as a mediator between Catholics and Protestants, but she proved to be an intolerant Catholic Queen, and she had hundreds of her subjects p...... to death for religious reasons, a fact which e..... her the sobriquet of 'Bloody Mary', which is how she's known in history. Now that you know what happened, can you state an opinion about your daughter's reign?


H: It's not for me to judge her, but I can tell you that her behaviour does not s........ me in the least. I always knew Mary was a fervent Catholic, like her mother.


J: However, you may be pleased to know that as far as Elizabeth, your daughter by Anne Boleyn, is c........., it was a completely different story. 'The Good Queen Bess', as she was sometimes affectionately called, or 'the Virgin Queen', because she never wished to get married, r....... wisely for 44 years; in religion, she was a convinced Protestant, but much more m....... than you or Mary had been and, in the military domain, by d...... the all-powerful Spanish Armada, she gave England days of glory, something that you were never able to a........ Have you got anything to say about her?


H: I'm not surprised e...... Elizabeth was educated as a Protestant, and my blood ran t......... her veins. Regarding her brilliant military success, it shouldn't be forgotten that it was d..... my reign that a permanent Royal Navy was created.


J: Now, King Henry, after so many women in your life, your six wives and the g..... number of mistresses you had besides, can you tell me if there e...... was a woman you really loved?


H: Believe it o..... not, the only woman I ever really loved was Catherine of Aragon, my first wife.


J: You say you loved her, and y...... you repudiated her and had your marriage to her annulled.


H: For pure r...... of state. Much a...... I loved her, the fact remains that she f....... to give me a son. I needed a male heir, and so I had to marry s........ else, but she always had my respect, and I saw t..... it that she was treated fairly, even t..... she had refused to accept my suggestion that she r....... to a nunnery, facilitating in this way the annulment process.


J: Well, Your Majesty, the interview is now c....... to an end, but before we finish, here's my last question to you: I'm sure my readers would like to know, i..... view of the agitated life you led, if you have any r.......?


H: No, I have no regrets. I did what had to be d....... I played my role in English history and, w..... I to be born again, I would do exactly the same, with one exception.


J: What exception?


H: I spent too much time and money o..... festivals, celebrations, banquets, tournaments and t..... like. Actually, it was in the last tournament I took p...... in, in 1536, that I had my unfortunate jousting accident. I fell o..... my horse, and a leg w...... I had suffered years earlier re-opened. The doctors treated it, but it could never be h....... The wound festered and b........ ulcerated, thus preventing me f..... maintaining the level of physical activity I had previously enjoyed, giving me insufferable pain and making hell of the rest of my days on earth, my unsightly o...... hastening my death at the age of 55. Yes, you can be sure that if I were to be born again, I wouldn't make the same mistake.


J: Well, I thank you, Your Majesty, for the s......... of your answers.


H: You are w.......

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Talking Statues: mutilated text.(1st part)

Here you have again the first part of the interview to Henry VIII in my story 'Talking Statues'http://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2014/11/historias-y-humor-talking-statues.html, but the text is mutilated. I invite you to fill in the gaps. To help you, I give you the initial letter of every word omitted:


Journalist: Well, Your Majesty, I'm a reporter from The Times, and I'm here to ask you a few questions about your life and r......... I hope you don't mind, as some of my questions might s...... too personal to you.


King Henry VIII: Whether I mind or don't mind is beside the p......., since I've been programmed to answer, to the b........ of my knowledge, any questions I'm asked, no m....... how personal they may be.


J: OK, Your Majesty. Well, we'll s........ the general data everybody knows about, such as date of birth, duration of reign, date of death, etc., and concentrate on those i....... about which you can express an opinion.


K: All right, I'm ready, f......!


J: Well, Your Majesty, generally speaking, History doesn't hold a f...... opinion of your person or your reign. To start w....., you've been accused by some historians of getting rid of anyone who d...... oppose you by charging them with treason and having them b......., even when some, like Thomas More or Cromwell, had previously rendered useful services to the Crown. What do you have to say to this?


K: It is t...... that I ordered the execution of many knights of high standing, including Sir Thomas More and Thomas Cromwell, but you have to b...... in mind that those were turbulent times and the security of the state had to be the king's p........ And I, as King of England, had then p........ enemies: Charles I of Spain, following the annulment of my marriage to his a......, Catherine of Aragon, and P.... Clement VII, after my rejection of papal authority, being the most formidable, though b..... no means the only ones.


J: Well, on the face of it, it seems quite obvious that your reason for rejecting papal authority, initiating the English Reformation was the Pope's refusal to declare your marriage to Catherine n...... and void, but there are historians who argue that you would have finally decreed the separation of the English Church from Rome in any case, because you n..... were a true Catholic. Is that so?


K: No, that's completely false. I was a devout and well-informed Catholic, t..... the extent that my 1521 publication Assertio Septem Sacramentorum('Defence of the Seven Sacraments') earned me the title of Fidei Defensor ('Defender of the Faith), b...... upon me by Pope Leo X. And if Pope Clement had not been so dull-witted,

clearly ill-advised by Charles I of Spain, Catherine's nephew, England would have probably remained Catholic to the p...... day, though I must say that the dissolution of the monasteries would have been inevitable so that taxes once payable to Rome could be trasferred to the Crown, together w..... the riches the religious orders had amassed.


J: Now, for my readers' benefit, I'd like to ask you a few questions about your wives, who played such an important r..... in your life. As is w..... known, you were married six times: first, to Catherine of Aragon, the youngest surviving child of King Ferdinand II of Aragon and Queen Isabella I of Castile. Catherine gave you a d....., Mary, and remained your legitimate devoted wife for 24 years, but still you had the marriage annulled, why?


H: It is true that she gave me a daughter and, before that, she had given b..... to a son - Henry - who unfortunately died seven weeks later, but after 24 years of marriage, it became clear to me that she wouldn't be able to give me a son, and I needed a m..... heir and so did England. In addition t.... that, when she married me, Catherine was the widow of my brother Arthur, and though we had a papal dispensation, I was beginning to feel that we were c...... incest.


J: Come on, Your Majesty, don't be ridiculous! That's a poor pretext. Catherine and Arthur had indeed been married for 20 weeks, but Arthur d...... at the age of 15, which makes it practically impossible for their marriage to have been consummated. And b....., remember you had the papal dispensation, which your father, Henry VII, and the Spanish ambassador, had obtained when you were betrothed to Catherine in 1503, that is six years before you married her, and they had made sure that the dispensation would be valid even if Arthur and Catherine's marriage had been c..........


H: That is as it may be, yet I felt that in marrying Catherine I had acted. c...... to Leviticus 20:21: "He that marrieth his brother's wife, doth an unlawful thing..."


J: But when you married her, she was your brother's w......, not his wife. Isn't it more true then that you wanted your marriage to Catherine annulled because you had f....... madly in love with Ann Boleyn, an attractive young woman in the Queen's entourage, and you were determined to marry her at a..... costs?


H: No, that's w...... As I've already said, I badly needed a male h..... - I even contemplated the possibility of legitimising Henry FitzRoy, the bastard son I'd had by Elizabeth Blount, one of my m..... - but I finally decided to reject Catherine and marry a woman of child-bearing age.


J: Well, be it as it may, in the end you h.... your way, and Anne Boleyn became your second wife. She also gave you a daughter, Elizabeth, but she too f..... to give you the son you desired, but why did you have her beheaded?


H: She was accused of adultery, incest, witchcraft and treason. She was tried, found g....... and condemned to death.


J: You know very well that none of those charges was ever proved, but you were in a hurry to get r..... of her. Actually, the day after her execution, you became engaged to Jane Seymour, one of Anne's ladies-in-waiting, with whom you were having an a......, and whom you married ten days later. But, please tell me, are you really sure, d...... in your heart, that Anne was unfaithful to you?


H: I know she flirted with some men at court but, to be honest, I don't know for sure w....... she actually cuckolded me or not, and I reckon that will r...... a secret for ever.

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Historias y Humor: Talking Statues and reading comprehension exercises.

If you like English History, I suggest you read my story 'Talking Statues'http://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2014/11/historias-y-humor-talking-statues.html and, if you have some free time, do the reading comprehension exercises about it I proposehttp://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2014/11/talking-statues-suggestions-for.html

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Talking Statues: Suggestions for exploiting the story in the classroom.

Here are some suggestions for exploiting the story 'Talking Statues'http://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2014/11/historias-y-humor-talking-statues.html in the classroom. The exercises I propose can also be useful to students studying English on their own, just substituting reading comprehension for role-play:

Role-play

Interview Henry VIII's statue: one of the students takes the role of the journalist, and the other, that of Henry VIII's statue. Here are some suggested questions:

- When did you reign over England?
- Why did you want your marriage to Catherine of Aragon annulled?
- Why did you separate the English Church from Rome?
- Why did Pope Leo X grant you the title of 'Defender of the Faith?
- Why did you sense that your son Eward would not outlive you by many years?
- Why did you marry Anne of Cleves?
- How old were you when you died?
- What caused the wound in your leg reopen?
- Were Catherine Howard  and Anne Boleyn relatives?
- Why did you ask Catherine of Aragon, your first wife, to retire to a nunnery?
- What was the happiest day of your life?
- Was there any woman you really loved?

Identify Henry VIII's wives

Match the letters with the numbers:

a.- She's believed to have had her face pock-marked and her laugh resembling a horse's neigh
b.- There was no doubt she was unfaithful to Henry
c.- She looked after Henry in the last days of his life and gave him good advice
d.- She was Charles I of Spain's aunt
e.- She was charged with adultery, witchcraft, incest and treason, but the accusations may have been false
f.- She died  twelve days after giving birth to Henry's son, Edward

1.- Anne Boleyn
2.- Catherine Parr
3.- Jane Seymour
4.- Anne of Cleves
5.- Catherine of Aragon
6.- Catherine Howard

Synonyms

Find words in the story meaning the same or almost the same as the following:

1.- spooky
2.- hair-raising
3.- uncanny
4.- bewildering
5.- obtuse
6.- to cheat on your husband/wife
7.- repulsive
8.- sadness
9.- to wed
10.- to confer an honour on sb

Phrasal nouns

Breakthrough can be translated as 'descubrimiento decisivo', how would you translate these other phrasal nouns?:

a.- breakdown 
b.- break-in
c.- breakout
d.- breakup

Grammar review

- no matter how personal the questions may be (adverbial subordinates of concessionhttp://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2013/10/pinceladas-gramaticales-oraciones.html) 
- since I've been programmed to........ (because/as/since/forhttp://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2014/02/preparing-for-oposiciones_22.html)
- were I to be born again (inversion of subjecthttp://sanchezbenedito.blogspot.com.es/2013/08/inversion-del-sujeto.html)

Phonetics

Silent consonants: the 'g' is not pronounced in the word reign, what other words do you know containing a silent 'g'?

KEY (suggested answers)

Role-play: students' own answers, taking the story as a basis

Identifying Henry VIII's wives: a-4; b-6; c-2; d-5; e-1; f-3

Synonyms: 1- scary; 2- bloodcurdling; 3- uncanny; 4- amazing; 5-dull-witted; 6- cuckold, to be unfaithful; 7- unsightly; 8- sorrow; 9- to marry; 10. to bestow upon

Phrasal nouns:

breakdown - avería; depresión nerviosa; desglose; fracaso de conversaciones/negociaciones, relaciones, etc.; transformación química de alimentos
break-in - robo con allanamiento de morada
breakout - fuga de la cárcel
breakup - ruptura de relaciones/matrimonio, etc; desmembramiento, disolución (de grupos, asociaciones, empresas, imperios, etc); fracaso de negociaciones, conversaciones, etc.

Grammar review: See the links given

Phonetics: campaign, foreign, foreigner, sign, benign, malign, design, resign, gnome, gnu, gnarled, diaphragm

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Historias y humor: Talking Statues

Yesterday it was Halloween, the scariest day of the year, when thousands of restless ghosts go prowling around at night ready to appear to you. No ghost appeared to me, but I was visited in my sleep by one of these lost souls, who whispered in my ear a detailed account of some bloodcurdling events which took place in the England of the XVIth century, during Henry VIII's reign.
I ignore the identity of my mysterious visitor who, for all I know, might have been the unfortunate monarch himself, wanting to rehabilitate his memory. 
Anyhow, whoever this daunting spirit may have been, the recollection of what it told me is a bit blurred in my mind as I write this the morning after, but with what I do remember from this eerie dream and the historical data I know, I've made up a story, putting the words into the mouth of someone I imagine living  in the future, in a highly sophisticated, advanced world.
Well, here's the story, which I'm pleased to share with you:

TALKING STATUES

The first time I heard about talking statues was in 2030, that is ten years ago, when I was 14. It was my father who told me. He had seen it mentioned on the BBC's website, which he was very fond of and visited regularly.

Basically, it read as follows: a team of university professors of English history at Oxford had created a device to make the statues of the English Royalty in London, Manchester and other big cities talk to you. It was quite simple: all you had to do was, using your mobile phone, scan the plaque of the statue, and then you got a call from the King or Queen in question: "Hello, Victoria here...", and the statues proceeded to give you the main data about their life.

I was thrilled to the bone by the news. I had a passion for History, and always got A's in English History at school. So I begged my father to take me to London to hear the statues speak, and he promised to take me there on my summer holidays.

My father kept his promise and, in July, as I got off the plane at Heathrow, I was full of joyful anticipation, for I knew that soon I would be able to realize my dream.

I couldn't wait, so that the very next day I began my tour of the statues.  I visited  Alfred the Great's one, at Trinity Church Square, Richard I's, outside the Palace of Westminster, Henry VIII's at the entrance to St Bartholomew's Hospital, Elizabeth I's, at St Dunstan-in-the-West, Charles I's, at Charing Cross and Victoria's, at Kensingston Gardens, among others, but I confess I was a bit disappointed, since I learnt nothing that I didn't know already.

I continued with my studies and soon forgot about the talking statues. But the team of researchers from Oxford University went on investigating and now, ten years later, they've come up with something really amazing: they've succeeded in turning the talking statues into a sort of talking robots, giving them the capacity to express their own thoughts and feelings. Now that is absolutely fascinating, a major breakthrough, as the possibilities it opens up are unlimited.

By way of example, I will offer you, in its totality, the interview to Henry VIII' statue, conducted by a prestigious London journalist two days ago:

Journalist: Well, Your Majesty, I'm a reporter from The Times, and I'm here to ask you a few questions about your life and reign. I hope you don't mind, as some of my questions might seem too personal to you.

King Henry VIII: Whether I mind or don't mind is beside the point, since I've been programmed to answer, to the best of my knowledge, any questions I'm asked, no matter how personal they may be.

J: OK, Your Majesty. Well, we'll skip the general data everybody knows about, such as date of birth, duration of reign, date of death, etc., and concentrate on those issues about which you can express an opinion. 

K: All right, I'm ready, fire!

J: Well, Your Majesty, generally speaking, History doesn't hold a favourable opinion of your person or your reign. To start with, you've been accused by some historians of getting rid of anyone who dared oppose you by charging them with treason and having them beheaded, even when some, like Thomas More or Cromwell, had previously rendered useful services to the Crown. What do you have to say to this?

K: It is true that I ordered the execution of many knights of high standing, including Sir Thomas More and Thomas Cromwell, but you have to bear in mind that those were turbulent times and the security of the state had to be the king's priority. And I, as King of England, had then powerful enemies: Charles I of Spain, following the annulment of my marriage to his aunt, Catherine of Aragon, and Pope Clement VII, after my rejection of papal authority, being the most formidable, though by no means the only ones.

J: Well, on the face of it, it seems quite obvious that your reason for rejecting papal authority, initiating the English Reformation was the Pope's refusal to declare your marriage to Catherine null and void, but there are historians who argue that you would have finally decreed the separation of the English Church from Rome in any case, because you  never were a true Catholic. Is that so?

K: No, that's completely false. I was a devout and well-informed Catholic, to the extent that my 1521 publication Assertio Septem Sacramentorum ('Defence of the Seven Sacraments') earned me the title of Fidei Defensor ('Defender of the Faith), bestowed upon me by Pope Leo X. And if Pope Clement had not been so dull-witted,
clearly ill-advised by Charles I of Spain, Catherine's nephew, England would have probably remained Catholic to the present day, though I must say that the dissolution of the monasteries would have been inevitable so that taxes once payable to Rome could be trasferred to the Crown, together with the riches the religious orders had amassed.

J: Now, for my readers' benefit, I'd like to ask you a few questions about your wives, who played such an important role in your life. As is well known, you were married six times: first, to Catherine of Aragon, the youngest surviving child of King Ferdinand II of Aragon and Queen Isabella I of Castile.  Catherine gave you a daughter, Mary, and remained your legitimate devoted wife for 24 years, but still you had the marriage annulled, why?

H: It is true that she gave me a daughter and, before that, she had given birth to a son - Henry - who unfortunately died seven weeks later, but after 24 years of marriage, it became clear to me that she wouldn't be able to give me a son, and I needed a male heir and so did England. In addition to that, when she married me, Catherine was the widow of my brother Arthur, and though we had a papal dispensation, I was beginning to feel that we were committing incest.

J: Come on, Your Majesty, don't be ridiculous! That's a poor pretext. Catherine and Arthur had indeed been married for 20 weeks, but Arthur died at the age of 15, which makes it practically impossible for their marriage to have been consummated. And besides, remember you had the papal dispensation, which your father, Henry VII, and the Spanish ambassador, had obtained when you were betrothed to Catherine in 1503, that is six years before you married her, and they had made sure that the dispensation would be valid even if Arthur and Catherine's marriage had been consummated. 

H: That is as it may be, yet I felt that in marrying Catherine I had acted contrary to Leviticus 20:21: "He that marrieth his brother's wife, doth an unlawful thing..."

J: But when you married her, she was your brother's widow, not his wife. Isn't it  more true then that you wanted your marriage to Catherine annulled because you had fallen madly in love with Ann Boleyn, an attractive young woman in the Queen's entourage, and you were determined to marry her at all costs? 

H: No, that's wrong. As I've already said, I badly needed a male heir - I even contemplated the possibility of legitimising Henry FitzRoy, the bastard son I'd had by Elizabeth Blount, one of my mistresses - but I finally decided to reject Catherine and marry a woman of child-bearing age.

J: Well, be it as it may, in the end you had your way, and Anne Boleyn became your second wife. She also gave you a daughter, Elizabeth, but she too failed to give you the son you desired, but why did you have her beheaded? 

H: She was accused of adultery, incest, witchcraft and treason. She was tried, found guilty and condemned to death.

J: You know very well that none of those charges was ever proved, but you were in a hurry to get rid of her. Actually, the day after her execution, you became engaged to Jane Seymour, one of Anne's ladies-in-waiting, with whom you were having an affair, and whom you married ten days later. But, please tell me, are you really sure, deep in your heart, that Anne was unfaithful to you?

H: I know she flirted with some men at court but, to be honest, I don't know for sure whether she actually cuckolded me or not, and I reckon that will remain a secret for ever.

J: Well, it was Jane Seymour, your third wife, who finally gave birth, in 1537, to a son, Prince Edward, the future Edward VI. You must have been very happy the day he was born?

H: Yes, it was, without a doubt, the happiest day of my life, and the event was celebrated all over the country, but my happiness soon turned to sorrow. It had been a difficult delivery, and Jane died 12 days later from an infection.

J:  Well, in any case, you had at last the male heir you had so long wished for, why then did you have to marry Anne of Cleves, your fourth wife, a German lady who cannot be said to have been a paragon of beauty, her face allegedly being pock-marked and her laugh resembling a horse's neigh?

H: She was not as ugly and disagreeable as you are making her out to be, but it is true that I was misled by a much too flattering portrait Hans Holbein the Younger had painted of her at my request, and indeed when we first met, I found she was quite unattractive. I married her nevertheless in an attempt to ensure my succession. I was worried about Edward. The royal doctors had told me that the Prince's health was poor, and I somehow sensed that he wouldn't outlive me by many years. 

J: Anyway, it seems that you could not overcome the revulsion Anne's hideous looks made you feel, to the extent that it was rumoured you could not even make love to her. Therefore, less than six months after you had married her, you expressed your desire to annul the marriage so that you could wed another. Anne had the good sense to confirm that the marriage had never been consummated, probably saving her life by her admission.

H: Yes, the marriage was dissolved, but we remained good friends. Anne received the title of 'The King's Sister', two houses and a generous allowance.

J: Well, free again, you married for the fifth time, the woman of your choice being now the young and beautiful Catherine Howard, Anne Boleyn's cousin and her lady-in-waiting. But the marriage to Catherine didn't last long either, as she was, like her cousin Anne had been, beheaded. But why did you have her beheaded?

H: Well, she was found guilty of adultery, this time without the shadow of a doubt so, much to my regret, the only thing I could do was to order her execution to safeguard my honour.

J: Finally, in 1543,  four years before your death, you married the wealthy widow Catherine Parr, your sixth and last wife. What can you tell me about her?

H: Catherine proved to be a good choice. She looked after me, patiently enduring my frequent changes of mood, brought about by my painful disease and, soon after we were married, she persuaded me to be reconciled with my daughters Mary and Elizabeth who, through An Act of Parliament, were duly put back in the line of succession after Edward, Prince of Wales.

J: And they both became Queens in due time: first Mary, when Edward died when he was only 15, confirming your premonition about him, and then Elizabeth, after Mary died without issue. Concerning Mary, it's been suggested you may have entertained hopes that when she acceded to the throne, she would serve as a mediator between Catholics and Protestants, but she proved to be an intolerant Catholic Queen, and she had hundreds of her subjects put to death for religious reasons, a fact which earned her the sobriquet of 'Bloody Mary', which is how she's known in history. Now that you know what happened, can you state an opinion about your daughter's reign?

H: It's not for me to judge her, but I can tell you that her behaviour does not surprise me in the least. I always knew Mary was a fervent Catholic, like her mother.

J: However, you may be pleased to know that as far as Elizabeth, your daughter by Anne Boleyn, is concerned, it was a completely different story. 'The Good Queen Bess', as she was sometimes affectionately called, or 'the Virgin Queen', because she never wished to get married, reigned wisely for 44 years; in religion, she was a convinced Protestant, but much more moderate than you or Mary had been and, in the military domain, by defeating the all-powerful Spanish Armada, she gave England days of glory, something that you were never able to achieve. Have you got anything to say about her?

H: I'm not surprised either. Elizabeth was educated as a Protestant, and my blood ran through her veins. Regarding her brilliant military success, it shouldn't be forgotten that it was during my reign that a permanent Royal Navy was created.  

J: Now, King Henry, after so many women in your life, your six wives and the great number of mistresses you had besides, can you tell me if there ever was a woman you really loved?

H: Believe it or not, the only woman I ever really loved was Catherine of Aragon, my first wife.

J: You say you loved her, and yet you repudiated her and had your marriage to her annulled.

H: For pure reasons of state. Much as I loved her, the fact remains that she failed to give me a son. I needed a male heir, and so I had to marry someone else, but she always had my respect, and I saw to it that she was treated fairly, even though she had refused to accept my suggestion that she retire to a nunnery, facilitating in this way the annulment process.

J: Well, Your Majesty, the interview is now coming to an end, but before we finish, here's my last question to you: I'm sure my readers would like to know, in view of the agitated life you led, if you have any regrets?

H: No, I have no regrets. I did what had to be done. I played my role in English history and, were I to be born again, I would do exactly the same, with one exception.

J: What exception?

H: I spent too much time and money on festivals, celebrations, banquets, tournaments and the like. Actually, it was in the last tournament I took part in, in 1536, that I had my unfortunate jousting accident. I fell off my horse, and a leg wound I had suffered years earlier re-opened. The doctors treated it, but it could never be healed. The wound festered and became ulcerated, thus preventing me from maintaining the level of physical activity I had previously enjoyed, giving me insufferable pain and making hell of the rest of my days on earth, my unsightly obesity hastening my death at the age of 55. Yes, you can be sure that if I were to be born again, I wouldn't make the same mistake.

J: Well, I thank you, Your Majesty, for the sincerity of your answers.

H: You are welcome.

COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS

1.-   Who granted Henry VIII the title of Defender of the Faith?

2.- When did Henry VIII and Catherine of Aragon get married?

3.- What was the family relationship between Charles I of Spain and Catherine of Aragon?

4.- Who was Henry FitzRoy's mother?

5.- What made Henry think that Anne of Cleves was prettier than she really was?

6.- How long were Henry VIII and Anne of Cleves married?

7.- When was Henry reconciled with her daughters Mary and Elizabeth?

8.- When did Henry VIII die?

9.- What does Henry say was his only regret?

10.- Do you believe Henry’s answers to the journalist were 100% sincere? If you don’t, where do you think he may have lied? Discuss.

KEY (suggested answers)

1.- Pope Leo X

2.- In 1509

3.- Charles I was Catherine’s nephew/Catherine was Charles I’s aunt.

4.-Elizabeth Blount, one of Henry’s mistresses.

5.- He was misled by the portrait Hans Holbein the Younger had painted of her, which was much too flattering.

6.- Six months.

7.- Near the end of his life, following Catherine’s Parr’s advice to him.

8.- In 1547

9.- That he had held so many festivals, celebrations, banquets and tournaments, which ruined his life and hastened his death.

10.- Students’ own answers.

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